Leonhardt aka "Loewe" (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
eyesofstrength) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
lucetilogs2012-03-11 09:30 am
eyesofstrength) wrote in lucetilogs2012-03-11 09:30 am
(no subject)
Who: Leonhardt and Joshua Bright and later Dr. Willock and potentially Estelle Bright
What: Character death and the depressing reactions to it
When: March 11th, afternoon and going into evening
Where: Starting in the plaza and ending in the clinic
Summary: Ever since his return, Leonhardt had been acting rather strangely and hiding things and unfortunately he's far too stubborn and distrustful to seek out the help he needs to prevent this from happening in the first place.
Rating: PG-13 for death, warning for Leonhardt's suicidal tendencies and spoilers
[It had been a week since Leonhardt returned to Luceti and found himself alive again, though not quite well either physically or emotionally. It was a shock to find himself alive and back in Luceti after making such effort to ensure he would die in his own world because of his reckless actions that it sent him spiraling into depression and still wanting to die. Unfortunately, while the Malnosso were able to put back together his broken body as it had been before, it would seem one of the numerous wounds he sustained in the explosion of the barrier got infected likely some time after he arrived here.
He had definitely not been well when he returned, and though it at first appeared as if he had gotten better, it was more that he was better able to hide his symptoms except for the fact that he was acting far more withdrawn than normal. And for someone like him, that's downright not sociable in the least bit. As the week progressed he started going downhill more and more as the infection continued to spread in his body and get worse and his chances for survival grew more and more slim, and he was fine with that. He had never been convinced that death in Luceti was temporary and felt that he no longer deserved to be among the living.
Of course it was something Joshua would not accept, and neither would Estelle. Joshua had been on his case to go to one of the clinics and he had been dodging that subject because he didn't want to go. So instead he lied and said he had gone and was told to get rest and plenty of fluids and check back with the doctor in a few days.
And that was what brought Leonhardt out today to the plaza. He was being forced to go back and check in, though honestly the moment he was outside he forgot about that entirely. It was a pretty day out, and the warm didn't bother him, it actually felt good with how chilled he felt. Instead he decided to head over to the memory garden to see if the flowers had begun to bloom yet. Even if they hadn't, he wanted to be close to Karin. Unfortunately, in his weakened state he could only make it to the fountain before he couldn't handle the lightheadedness any longer and needed to sit before he passed out. So he decided to find a nice spot in the sun to rest for a bit.]
[ooc: And if you guys want a separate thread or threads for reactions after he dies to skip ahead there, that's fine. PM me if you need any info for that.]
What: Character death and the depressing reactions to it
When: March 11th, afternoon and going into evening
Where: Starting in the plaza and ending in the clinic
Summary: Ever since his return, Leonhardt had been acting rather strangely and hiding things and unfortunately he's far too stubborn and distrustful to seek out the help he needs to prevent this from happening in the first place.
Rating: PG-13 for death, warning for Leonhardt's suicidal tendencies and spoilers
[It had been a week since Leonhardt returned to Luceti and found himself alive again, though not quite well either physically or emotionally. It was a shock to find himself alive and back in Luceti after making such effort to ensure he would die in his own world because of his reckless actions that it sent him spiraling into depression and still wanting to die. Unfortunately, while the Malnosso were able to put back together his broken body as it had been before, it would seem one of the numerous wounds he sustained in the explosion of the barrier got infected likely some time after he arrived here.
He had definitely not been well when he returned, and though it at first appeared as if he had gotten better, it was more that he was better able to hide his symptoms except for the fact that he was acting far more withdrawn than normal. And for someone like him, that's downright not sociable in the least bit. As the week progressed he started going downhill more and more as the infection continued to spread in his body and get worse and his chances for survival grew more and more slim, and he was fine with that. He had never been convinced that death in Luceti was temporary and felt that he no longer deserved to be among the living.
Of course it was something Joshua would not accept, and neither would Estelle. Joshua had been on his case to go to one of the clinics and he had been dodging that subject because he didn't want to go. So instead he lied and said he had gone and was told to get rest and plenty of fluids and check back with the doctor in a few days.
And that was what brought Leonhardt out today to the plaza. He was being forced to go back and check in, though honestly the moment he was outside he forgot about that entirely. It was a pretty day out, and the warm didn't bother him, it actually felt good with how chilled he felt. Instead he decided to head over to the memory garden to see if the flowers had begun to bloom yet. Even if they hadn't, he wanted to be close to Karin. Unfortunately, in his weakened state he could only make it to the fountain before he couldn't handle the lightheadedness any longer and needed to sit before he passed out. So he decided to find a nice spot in the sun to rest for a bit.]
[ooc: And if you guys want a separate thread or threads for reactions after he dies to skip ahead there, that's fine. PM me if you need any info for that.]
no subject
But he refrains from commenting specifically on that; instead, he turns to Willock after a moment, his tone still calm, but also laced with a distinct hint of worry that he can't quite seem to keep out of his voice anymore.]
...Is there anything else I can do to help? [Even if he's planning on staying next to Leonhardt, he can probably still manage to use the Body-Split craft one or two more times to assist if he can. If not... maybe he should at least try to contact Estelle using the journal. It couldn't hurt to let her know what's going on, right?]
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There should be some dressings and antiseptic up in one of those cabinets. You can bring those down. [What Leonhardt really needs is surgical debridement--possibly even amputation--but Willock wouldn't dare sending him into surgery in this state. At the very least, he can try and improve the appearance of the wound while he waits to see if the antibiotics will kick in. He isn't feeling very hopeful about that 'if.'
And he should let Joshua know, however indirectly. He looks back at the boy, his commanding tone softening to something more gentle.]
If he has any other family here, you should probably try to get ahold of them.
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And at that last statement to Joshua, there is truly no reaction from Leonhardt and he still seems to be somewhat aware of his surroundings. Of course that likely just shows he chose to let it get this advanced.]
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The meaning behind Willock's words isn't lost on Joshua, however. And perhaps it's because of this that his reaction is rather brief this time; a small nod in acknowledgment followed by two simple words, spoken both rather quietly and in a tone that's entirely too flat.]
... All right.
[Following that, he takes a moment to focus before making use of the Body-Split craft again, this time letting the shadow fade into existence in plain sight. As it goes to retrieve the requested items, Joshua himself moves his hand away from Leonhardt's in order to take out out his journal and use it to write a short message to Estelle, his handwriting messier than it would normally be. Once finished, he'll tuck the journal away again, letting his hand rest on Leonhardt's own again when that's done with as well.
...Hopefully it won't take her all that long to notice the message.]
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He dabs and wipes at the edges of the wound with antiseptic, then spreads a fresh dressing over it. He glances briefly at Leonhardt's face to see if he's showing any kind of pain--if he's going to remain conscious for much longer, Willock should probably give him a few injections of morphine, in spite of his shallow breathing. He turns his eyes to the EKG, wondering if he can risk stepping out to send someone out for the painkiller. He shouldn't make any more requests of Joshua, knowing what he knows now.
Leonhardt's heart rate is weak, but the rhythmic beeping isn't slowing, so he quickly washes his hands and gestures to Joshua to stay put.]
One second. I'm going to find some morphine.
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Joshua, however, will notice that Leonhardt's grip loosens as his arm goes limp. He's lost consciousness again, but everything else shows he's still alive, for now at least. It's honestly pretty doubtful he's going to wake up again, especially if given a high enough dose of morphine that it actually does anything.]
[ooc: just a quick note, Misa asked that we go and skip ahead at least til Estelle shows up to speed things up a bit more.]
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And for that something to be happening at the clinic, well.
Her eyes widen at the sight of Leonhardt on the bed. He looks horrible! She quickly crosses the room to him and Joshua and the doctor, looking between them with concern. Her very first thought is that something must have attacked him, but that doesn't seem right.]
What happened?!
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For a moment, there's a hint of relief on his face, but it vanishes just as quickly as it appeared, abruptly replaced by a more neutral expression.]
He lost consciousness. [Twice, now. His tone yet again sounds far too flat, being more matter-of-factly than anything else; that's the absolute basics of the situation, and at this point, it's incredibly obvious what the reason for him passing out like that is, but... he can't quite bring himself to actually mention it. Not right now.]
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He addresses her calmly but gently.]
He's in septic shock. A wound on his leg became infected and the infection has since entered his bloodstream. I have him on fluids and antibiotics right now.
[He doesn't tell her the odds. He doesn't express just how bad that gangrenous cut looked. Best not to hit her with too much right away.]
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[Estelle blinks at the doctor, and then looks back to Joshua as she processes that information. Shock she can understand, even though medical terms don't quite make that much sense to her. Losing consciousness would rank up there with the big problems though, especially since Leonhardt was so incredibly tough.
Her eyes fall across the bandaging once again when she looks back to him and tries to piece it all together. As far as she knows, there was only once when he was hurt, and that was over a week ago. Her eyes widen and she crosses the room to stand by the bed.]
He was hurt then? Why didn't he tell us??
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So why didn't he...?
Somehow, all this is only serving to bring the first time Leonhardt ended up in the clinic to mind for Joshua... or more specifically, a few of the things his brother said during that time.
He doesn't answer Estelle's question. In fact, rather than respond, he suddenly shifts his gaze away almost uneasily, as if he isn't comfortable with this question... or the answer it brings to mind for him, perhaps. It's hard to say for sure.]
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[Estelle blinks at him when he glances away like that. She doubts he had any idea this was happening. No, she can tell how much it's bothering him too. It's not as bad as they're making it sound, is it? But then he definitely wouldn't be acting like this if it wasn't.
Maybe she shouldn't be pressing him for answers. She goes quiet for a moment, before looking back to the doctor. Since Leonhardt isn't awake, there's nothing he can tell her.]
Is this...
[It's quite hard to ask the actual question, but she has to know. Even for being a bit of a jerk, he never quite struck her as their enemy. And while she doesn't want to put pressure on the doctor, this is why they are here.]
Is this something you can fix?
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It may well be indicating that no, the doctor can't fix this.]
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It's when Leonhardt starts gasping for air that he finally shows some sort of reaction beyond uneasily glancing away - for a moment, he's actually visibly startled. Why now? Outside of losing consciousness again, Leonhardt's condition had been kind of stable for a while now, but it was still concerning. It worsening is just about the last thing any of them need at the moment.
By the time his brother's breathing briefly stops and then resumes again, Joshua's initial surprise has been replaced by a concerned look cast in Willock's direction. This... definitely isn't good, but there's bound to still something they can do to help him. Something. Anything. Just... some way to make sure his condition doesn't worsen even further. Right?
...He's more or less deluding himself into at least trying to be a bit optimistic at this point, honestly. It's not working well at all considering how the situation has been progressing, however - with his tendency to see things from a more logical and realistic point of view, it's incredibly hard to maintain any sort of optimism at this point. There's just far too much that points toward this whole mess most likely not ending well, if this keeps up.]
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Septic shock is a very serious condition. Whether he recovers is dependent on whether he responds to the antibiotics, and I haven't seen any sign of that yet. The infection may be too widespread at this point to treat, especially if his heart has seen a lot of damage.
[The abnormal breathing captures his attention and he quickly adjusts the amount of oxygen going to the mask, only to hear Leonhardt go silent for a few moments. Oh, no. He could try a different method of ventilation, but he fears it'll be too risky at this point. He meets Joshua's eyes briefly, his expression grave, then turns to the EKG monitor.
Sure enough, Leonhardt's cardiac output is dropping. As the beats grow weaker and more spread out, threatening a flatline, Willock goes for the bottle of epinephrine, loading a syringe. He inserts the needle between Leonhardt's ribs, quickly injecting the hormone into his heart.]
Come on. [It's a soft command, already a little resigned. He can't do much more than this.]
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[Come on, the doctor's just being cautious when he says that, right? Estelle stares from him to Leonhardt, having trouble believing those words. It's definitely not that she thinks that he's lying, or not trying hard enough, or that maybe they don't have what they need in order to save him, but that someone like Leonhardt, who made such a big deal out of how strong that they needed to be to survive would succumb to anything so easily. It's like saying that their dad would lose in a fight. That's not really taking into account the fact that somehow, for some reason, Leonhardt seems to have let this happen, but even that doesn't make any sense!
Just when she's about to open her mouth to suggest something, she jumps at the sudden change in Leonhardt's condition as the doctor responds to it. She can't really help the urge to suddenly reach out and grab the swordsman's hand when he stops breathing, giving it the same sort of squeeze she would any other friend, and a shake to the bed as if that will wake him up somehow.]
H-hey! That's not cool, Leonhardt! Do you know what you're doing? Snap out of it!
[It might not be her place to be the one getting worked up here, but it's actually quite scary to see someone so tough just... giving out like that. Doesn't he realize what's happening? She can only guess what it's doing to Joshua! Her gaze darts to the doctor as he does something with a needle and sticks it into him, and she holds back the urge to shake him again in an attempt to let the doctor do his job.]
What was all of that about having the strength to defeat you?!
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Just like Arianrhod had told him once, he was dead on the inside. She may have apologized for that, but it was the truth. He had no will to live and had only lived as long as he did because he was normally so hard to kill.
Though despite this, for a very short time, it almost seems like the injection he's given may actually turn things around. Leonhardt's breathing grows more normal and his heart is beating steadily again at its normal, albeit slow, rate.
But as quickly as that happens it just stops working like he was never given the injection in the first place. It isn't very long before his breathing stops again entirely and shows no signs of starting back up. His heart follows soon after and stops as well. Any attempts at trying to resuscitate him will sadly fail.]
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The initial reaction to the epinephrine is a bit more reassuring. That helped, it seems. That's a good sign, isn't it? If that worked, then maybe he'll actually re--
--and before Joshua can finish that train of thought, Leonhardt's condition abruptly worsens again. As soon as his breathing ceases again, this time with no sign of resuming, the boy's expression simply goes dead.
It's not until a little later when the EKG begins to display a flatline that Joshua actually manages to say something in response to what had just happened.]
Loewe...? [His voice is so quiet that it's actually difficult to hear - it's practically a nigh-inaudible plea for some sort of reaction from his brother. Whether it's his heart and breathing resuming or him actually waking up or... something. Not... not this. Anything but this.]
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Nothing. Leonhardt is dead.
Willock straightens, eyes glancing over the clock to note the time, a sigh escaping his lips. He regards Joshua.]
I'm sorry. He's gone.
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It all happens so quickly that it just seems fake somehow. She is startled by the movement of the doctor rolling him over and trying to start his heart again, and her eyes fly to the machine that monitors him, then to Joshua, and just nothing at all seems appropriate to say. After all, she just walked in on this. She didn't even know something was wrong. How could this just happen so suddenly? But even with all that the doctor's doing it doesn't seem to be doing anything at all.
When he apologizes, Estelle's eyes begin to sting and she brings her hands to her mouth. No... no way.]
...
[Even if they weren't particularly close, it's very difficult to accept that she's hearing him right. This was Joshua's brother... And in a sense, even if he only briefly acted like it because of that experiment, that made him family too.]
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It's hard to tell if his unresponsiveness is because he can't think of a way to react, because he doesn't want to react, or because he genuinely hasn't realized that someone is speaking to him. Any one of those three scenarios is possible, frankly. It's not until a few more moments pass that the boy does something other than stare, and even then, all he does is raise his right hand and press it against his heart.]
...
[It definitely looks like it will take a bit more than just addressing him normally to elicit an actual reaction from the boy. As it is, it's starting to seem as if he's either spacing out, or trying to shut himself off in response to what had just happened - and regardless of which of those two options it is, that's likely not a good thing.]
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He doesn't go to him right away--he sets the stuff aside, washes his hands, and thinks of what to write on Leonhardt's records. He thinks and realizes something, and that takes him to Joshua's side, his hand settling gently on the boy's shoulder.]
What's Leonhardt's last name?
[He caught the first name, but not the last. Funny how these situations play out, how much he just did for someone he'd never met, whose full name he doesn't even know.]
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Did he have one? That... that was also something he never told her. Maybe he told Joshua though, or maybe he wouldn't want to say it. She has to bite her tongue not to speak up right now since it just doesn't seem right. What would she say anyway? Leonhardt probably would have objected if she butted into something like this.]
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It's not that strange that his reaction this time seems to be more along the lines of general unresponsiveness, is it?
Except... that doesn't seem to be it, either. Much like before, the boy shows no reaction whatsoever to anything happening. Not to Willock's actions, nor to Estelle's tears. It's only when the doctor places a hand on his shoulder that Joshua actually reacts - though rather than answer the question, he completely tenses up, as if startled somehow.
...Maybe he really was spacing out.]
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